The important thing isn’t what happens in life… The important thing is how you deal with it! I believe that many people today are afflicted by a very serious disease: the disease of negativity! The restricting boundaries we inflict on ourselves, our lives and, by extent, our surroundings, by endlessly channeling into them our negative thoughts, are simply unbelievable! I dare you to conduct an experiment… Observe your friends’ discussions. Notice how many times their sentences contain the catalytic word “but”. This word has, in itself, so much power that it can drain us of our energy. The following groups of statements are simple examples of negative versus positive thinking:

Group A:

  1. I want to start asking for work, yes; but I’m afraid because I know there are no opportunities.
  2. I want to take dancing lessons but I’m ashamed – I know I won’t be any good at it…
  3. I want to plan a getaway this weekend but I don’t have any money…
  4. I want to go to study abroad but I don’t think I would qualify…
  5. I want to meet a real man but I know there aren’t any around…

It is amazing how often this word is heard on a daily basis; and, unfortunately, it has played a significant part in our past, our present, our future… Have you ever wondered how different our lives could have turned out if we substituted the statements of Group A with those of Group B?

Group B:

  1. I’m going to start asking for work; it may be hard to find what I’m looking for; maybe I’ll come across some closed doors… but I believe that the tenth may be open!
  2. I want to take dancing lessons because I like dancing; in the end, whatever I learn is good – even if I’m not very talented.
  3. OK, I don’t have the money to go on a trip; instead, this time, I can have a good time doing something special with my friends.
  4. I want to go to study abroad. So, I will start saving; I will set goals; I will ask my family for help. I will patiently try to make my dream come true, no matter how many years it takes.
  5. When the time is right, I will meet the best man there is; because I’m worth it!

None of the above phrases contains the word “but”… Can you feel the energy that the statements of the second group exude without this word? Can you feel the negativity that the first group conveys? The statements of the second group have innumerable possibilities because it has no restrictions. The first group isn’t… going anywhere because its members will not even consider initiating any procedures – having preconceived the result. I’m not one for excessive optimism, as it crosses the line that separates it from utopia – and this perspective is also extreme. The point is, which group will we choose to belong to: A or B? The outcome is irrelevant. Negative, mediocre, satisfactory, good, perfect; it doesn’t matter. What matters is creating our own energy from the situations we desire – having ourselves become the medium for the result we are pursuing; by causing the result, instead of condemning it (thus exhibiting our insecurity and the limitation of our thoughts).

It’s not an accident that, upon reading the biographies of known artists, successful businessmen and other great personalities, we see that they all belonged to group B. They had much greater dilemmas to consider than the simple statements and questions of group A. But with the attitude of group B they thrived; because, at some point in life, they took some great risks, which allowed them to become special – with will, responsibility and strength. If we put in our everyday lives the dynamics of these words – words that empower us instead of drain us – other paths and new horizons will open wide in front of us. Give it a try…


Theodora Satolia


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